Funny Game: My Still Life

Can you tell which elements in this photo of my kitchen table represent the following aspects of my life?

1. My lust for upgrading vintage hi-fi
2. Looking smoooth
3. My raging poetic furnace
4. My need for home-made pasta
5. My disrespect for wooden surfaces when it comes to trimming photographs

Sex on the table in a pub

I fear my rogue search entries will really soar with this title.