We won the league

At Shitehart Lane

We won the league at Shitehart Lane

We won the league

At The Shit Hole

We won the league at Shitehart Lane

 

[when Adebayor is down injured]

Let him die, let him die, let him die… etc

 

Fuck off to Stratford

North London is ours

North London is ours

North London is ours

 

Adebayor -

What’s the score?

Adebayor -

What’s the score? etc.

 

2-0

And you fucked it up

2-0

And you fucked it up

2-0

And you fucked it up

2-0

And you fucked it up

 

There is also the one about Adebayor and Angola, but we already got in shit for that

Stephen Gerrard is in the dock. He beat up a businessman in a bar called ‘Lounge Inn’ in Southport (north of Liverpool), because he wanted control of the cd player in the bar. The businessman did not like either being bossed around or being called ‘lad’ by a ruffian 5 years his inferior. Just the typical clash of antlers I suppose. Men – weekends – booze – mates – public houses – egos – disco – fists. I don’t know why we don’t just cut off a testicle and play conkers with them.

Anyway, I was curious to see what sort of a shithole it is that premiership footballers like to hang out in. The bar’s website is here if you are interested, but I wouldn’t bother visiting the place itself: the venue looks as bland  and soulless as its name suggests.

I was intrigued by the photographic diary on the site however. The proprietors have got themselves a camera and have, bless them, been having a go at some event photography, seemingly to enrich the ‘Lounge Inn experience’ for their patrons who are invited to download fullsize versions as keepsakes.

Many people take crap photos. It is when they use them professionally things get funny. I mean look at this cracker:

It looks like this rambunctious fellow is about to eructate a gobfull of manky steak into his ladyfriend’s cleavage. Also, I love that charming ‘under the stairs’ ambience. One for the mantlepiece.

I love candid photography, especially when the photographer is as unknowing as the subject. There is something gruesomely true about it.

Mind you, the only insight that I seem to have gained from this wee web adventure is that if you are a lady and wish to hang out in a footballer’s drinking den, you should get highlights and look like you want to get into ‘New’ magazine.

Here is Robert Peston’s commentary on the refinancing of Liverpool FC, a situation on which I have had my beady eye for a while.

But Peston does not get to the nub of the problem. Liverpool and Manchester United have been borrowing to sustain performance. They will both find themselves having to pay back the money they have borrowed in aggregating their costly squads. And when they cut back on the spending their teams’ performances will most likely slip as well. But with less success, their revenue will decrease, limiting the clubs ability to repay debts further. With the danger of this de-leveraging spiral of decline looming, the future looks a bit bleak for the reds.

Arsenal is looking good, and will benefit if Man U and Liverpool go down the pan. They have virtually no debt, and are still in the top four simply because of Arsene Wenger’s sheer managing ability and resistance to media pressure to spend money on overpriced [English] players, seeking out undiscovered value from farther afield.

Chelsea are all right too. Abramovich is still flush, despite his massive losses due to the recession. He bought the club without masses of debt, unlike the Glazers and Gillett/Hicks who were more or less acting as agents for international banks and debt salesmen.

I hope that Liverpool is not an economic model for anything more widespread. Otherwise we really could all be in the brown stuff a few years down the line…