Match the odd descriptions with the photographs from my life! Win a prize!*

a.  A pretty array of component drawers in Cricklewood Electronic which is in Cricklewood

b. A fucking weird epitaph if ever I saw one

c. A tantalising view into the courtyard of a mysterious, anonymous, and ominous public building in Olympia. One local reckons it is the Royal bookstore, which I suppose means pornography collection

d. Notting Hill vinyl exchange. Which is a funny name for it as they only ever seem to exchange vinyl for money, which makes it more of a shop.

e. Tattoo of a young child on the palm of her uncle

f. The cool reflective muddle created by my flashy yet over-specified perspex Muji in-tray

*Prize is to decide upon and supply the prize for the next Funny Game competition

See if you can match the following captions with the images taken last weekend in Bristol, which I was visiting to enjoy the St Werburghs Festival:

1. A reveller outside the Minor’s Arms flounced off his binge on ecstasy pipes (or horse tranquilliser). He carries in his pocket a book entitled: “How to fossilise your hamster”

2. An unusual and ghostly close friend of mine guarding two teacups of cider brandy on top of St Werburghs hill at 5AM

3. A witty graffito drawing an analogy between the hysteria or jaundiced consumerism of popular culture and current political events

4. A shopkeeper’s attempt to con some Gloucester Road shopper into a purchasing a lame and tatty item on the basis of endearing humour

5. A remnant of clothing being attacked by a rogue element of road-marking.

6. “Bringing down the system / sticking it to the man”

If you do manage to solve this brainteaser, then send me your answers and I will see if I can bring myself to read them.